Before I had kids, I was a skilled and logical debate opponent. There wasn't a position that I couldn't successfully support – my husband didn't stand a chance. Now, my marital arguments go something like this…
- Disagree with spouse about X.
- Immediately become distracted from X by child that needs to poo.
- Return to feeling irritated with spouse while trying to remember what X was.
- Find something else to argue about that has nothing to do with X – preferably something that begins with “You always…”
- Figure out midway through that new argument is completely unreasonable.
- Continue to argue on principle. After all, spouse is wrong about something.
- Interrupt self to tell spouse something adorable that child did earlier – like when asked what month it is declaring that it is “Maypril.”
- Laugh together and then remember that one is supposed to be mad at spouse.
- Agree to move on as long as spouse acknowledges that he was completely wrong about everything.
- Be grateful that one has quite a reasonable spouse.
How do the arguments go down in your house? Have you maintained your fine sense of logic and diplomacy?